Thursday, November 25, 2010
Friday, November 19, 2010
Flat Stanley
Liam's class has just finished reading the book "Flat Stanley". They are going to be doing The Flat Stanley Project. Pretty much, this is a story about a kid who is flattened by a bulletin board. He then realizes he can do things like be stuffed in an envelope and mailed across country.
The project is for us to collect 3 addresses of people around the country/world for Flat Stanley to be mailed to. The person who receives Stanley will need to take pictures, write letters, etc about Stanley's adventure with them. Then they will mail it on to the next person. All of the postage is pre-paid, so no worries about any expense (besides taking pictures and writing a letter).
I do have an idea for one address to send to, but I am wondering if anyone else would be interested in helping out. I'd love to find at least one address out of the US!
The project is for us to collect 3 addresses of people around the country/world for Flat Stanley to be mailed to. The person who receives Stanley will need to take pictures, write letters, etc about Stanley's adventure with them. Then they will mail it on to the next person. All of the postage is pre-paid, so no worries about any expense (besides taking pictures and writing a letter).
I do have an idea for one address to send to, but I am wondering if anyone else would be interested in helping out. I'd love to find at least one address out of the US!
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Happy Halloween to me...
Halloween is my favorite holiday. I love getting dressed up with the kids and going out Trick or Treating. It's not really even the idea of getting candy, but going out and seeing other people and seeing how excited the kids get. This year I was really excited since I made the boys' costumes.
In September we began work on these costumes. Ethan wanted to be a dragon. I cut out felt triangles and hot-glued them onto a shirt. I hand painted glitter on other triangles for a tummy piece. I molded teeth and eyes out of glow in the dark FIMO clay to go on a hat. I knitted a head cover with scales that I just finished last Friday.
Liam wanted to be a knight. I cut out pieces of cardboard and covered it in very expensive colored duct tape -- did a front and back chest piece and then arm pieces. Made a helmet out of cardboard and duct tape. Knowing that he couldn't wear the helmet to school, I then knitted him a fake chain mail hat (I'm blanking on the real name of it... I'll think of it later) so he could wear it to school. We bought him a foam sword and shield to go with it.
Both looked excellent. We went to Zoo Boo last weekend and people recognized what both of them were supposed to be. At the Squirrel Hill thing on Thursday, they thought it was great.
Tonight, however, Ethan refused to put his costume on. He told me he hates it and it's ugly. Liam didn't want to wear the majority of his costume. They decided they wanted to sit and watch TV. I wasn't nearly as hurt about wanting to watch TV as Ethan saying he hates the costume and it's ugly. I told him that he wasn't going out trick or treating without his costume. That's what you do and that's that. He bawled. I even told him "Wear the costume that Mommy slaved over for a month or go to your room". I feel awful about it, I really do, but I still feel hurt that the costume that he liked at one time, he now hates.
I told him he wasn't going out without the costume... and he went outside and cried to Karl, who was working on the car. I'm guessing that he let them go without costumes. Liam came inside and ordered me to light the jack-o-lanterns that are on the porch to be lit, mentioned something about a change of plans for Ethan to only wear part of his costume, and then left again.
So I'm currently home alone... I do have the porch light on, but TOT has been on for 50 minutes and no one has even passed by the house, so I think I'm just going to shut off all of the lights and sit in the dark. Maybe go to bed early or something...
Oh, and did I mention today is my 12th wedding anniversary?
I've been dressed in my costume since before 5:30 trying to get the kids ready to go out. Now they're out, probably without their costumes, having fun, and I'm home alone. Makes perfect sense, doesn't it?
Someone remind me of this the next time I want to do something special for the kids...
In September we began work on these costumes. Ethan wanted to be a dragon. I cut out felt triangles and hot-glued them onto a shirt. I hand painted glitter on other triangles for a tummy piece. I molded teeth and eyes out of glow in the dark FIMO clay to go on a hat. I knitted a head cover with scales that I just finished last Friday.
Liam wanted to be a knight. I cut out pieces of cardboard and covered it in very expensive colored duct tape -- did a front and back chest piece and then arm pieces. Made a helmet out of cardboard and duct tape. Knowing that he couldn't wear the helmet to school, I then knitted him a fake chain mail hat (I'm blanking on the real name of it... I'll think of it later) so he could wear it to school. We bought him a foam sword and shield to go with it.
Both looked excellent. We went to Zoo Boo last weekend and people recognized what both of them were supposed to be. At the Squirrel Hill thing on Thursday, they thought it was great.
Tonight, however, Ethan refused to put his costume on. He told me he hates it and it's ugly. Liam didn't want to wear the majority of his costume. They decided they wanted to sit and watch TV. I wasn't nearly as hurt about wanting to watch TV as Ethan saying he hates the costume and it's ugly. I told him that he wasn't going out trick or treating without his costume. That's what you do and that's that. He bawled. I even told him "Wear the costume that Mommy slaved over for a month or go to your room". I feel awful about it, I really do, but I still feel hurt that the costume that he liked at one time, he now hates.
I told him he wasn't going out without the costume... and he went outside and cried to Karl, who was working on the car. I'm guessing that he let them go without costumes. Liam came inside and ordered me to light the jack-o-lanterns that are on the porch to be lit, mentioned something about a change of plans for Ethan to only wear part of his costume, and then left again.
So I'm currently home alone... I do have the porch light on, but TOT has been on for 50 minutes and no one has even passed by the house, so I think I'm just going to shut off all of the lights and sit in the dark. Maybe go to bed early or something...
Oh, and did I mention today is my 12th wedding anniversary?
I've been dressed in my costume since before 5:30 trying to get the kids ready to go out. Now they're out, probably without their costumes, having fun, and I'm home alone. Makes perfect sense, doesn't it?
Someone remind me of this the next time I want to do something special for the kids...
Monday, September 20, 2010
No More Blood: Part 1
Ok. I just have to say that blood is now ILLEGAL in my house. I swear if CSI ever used Luminol in our house, they'd be blinded by the glare. Seriously.
Let's start with the blood work the boys had on the 9th. I figured I'd take them then since Liam didn't have school and we'd have the whole day tosuffer get it done. The plan was to drop one kid off at the Sibling Center (otherwise known as the best possible place in the known universe) while the other one had his blood work done. Then swap the kids and repeat. This way both kids get playtime at the Sibling Center and I only have to fight one child at a time with blood work.
Liam decided to "let" his brother go first since he had had blood work done last year and remembered it too well. Ethan never had blood work done before, so didn't know what he was in for. Liam had worked himself up into quite a tizzy. I had hoped that if I had told him about the blood work and reminded him that, while it hurt last time, it didn't take long and he survived it. I'm certain had he been on his regular medicine I would have been able to reason with him and calm him down. Unfortunately he was NOT to be reasoned with.
So he was sent off to the Sibling Center and I went upstairs with Ethan. Ethan *danced* up the stairs... singing "I'm getting blood work done! YAY!". Needless to say, people were very amused. We checked into the office and he got all excited. The registration girl asked if he knew what was happening and I said nope. He saw the lollipops on the desk and asked for one. The girl told him that he'd get one when he was done.
So we went to the waiting room and played with Liam's Leapster Explorer. When they called him into the office, he ran in and was all excited. The Phlebotomist saw on the paperwork that the doctor was Dr Faber, so asked if Ethan was Autistic. I told her we were unsure and explained that his "current diagnosis" was Disruptive Behavior Disorder NOS, Rule Out of PDD (Pervasive Development Disorder), Sensory Issues, and we're not totally sure on other things. She asked him to go into the room that was 1+1. Ethan looked at her. Laughed, said "That's two" and walked to the second door. She asked him what 2 + 5 was and he immediately answered 7. She just smiled like she totally knew what she was dealing with.
As an aside, the girls at Children's Hospital are *wonderful*. They always have two girls per kid. One is changing the vials and the other stays only with the child and the needle. This makes it perfectly wonderful for kids who fight. I love it :)
Anyways, so Ethan DANCES into the room and jumps into the chair (it's like a normal adult chair for blood collecting, but it's double size so the parent can sit beside) and starts playing the Leapster Explorer. I sit down beside him and the first Phlebotomist tells the second one that he'll be a bit interesting of a case. She said that he probably won't notice the needle at all or he'll over react. Second Phlebotomist seems to not believe her. I told them that they could do whatever they needed to -- don't worry about hiding blood from me or making him cry. I'm used to the routine *lol* (My Godson used to be quite an experience to get blood draws from... *shudders at the memories of 4 adults laying on him to do a blood draw at 3-4 years of age)
First Phlebotomist starts to explain to Ethan what they're going to do. He won't put down the Leapster Explorer, so we have to take it away to get him into position. He looks at them a bit odd when they put the rubber band on his arm, but nothing big. When they put the needle into his arm he says "ouch." and then does a bit of "ehhh" and mild whining. First Phlebotomist puts her hand up and covers the needle so he can't see it. He acts like nothing is happening. At all. He starts to try to get up and we have to remind him that no, he has to sit. I pull out the Leapster Explorer and told him that he can play it with his left hand. He then proceeds to play with his left hand like nothing is happening.
It was almost freaky to watch him. At one point I almost got up to video it with my cell phone because I was in such shock. First Phlebotomist looks at me and says "He's Aspergers isn't he?" Second Phlebotomist couldn't believe it at all. She says she has been doing this for years and has never seen a kid act like nothing wrong. She's seen them be calm and do the "Ok, it will be over soon" routine, but never acting like nothing is going on as they move the needle. They did approximately 19 vials. Yes. Nineteen. Dr Faber's first blood work is extensive.
I'm pretty sure he did the same initial work up as he did for Liam's initial work up a year ago. This is what he checked for on Liam's: Serum copper, plasma zinc, lead level, selenium level, T cell subsets - CD3, CD4, CD8, CD19, CD4/CD8 ratio, quantitative serum immunoglobulins, CBC and diff with platelets, ESR (Sedimentation rate) , Tissue transglutaminase (tTGA) IgA antibody, antigliadin antiboties, antigluten IgG antibotides, anticasein IgG antibodies, antisoy IgG antibodies, total protein, albumin, calcium, phosphrous, alkaline phosphatase, ammonia, iron, TIBC, percent Fe saturation, ferritin, free T4, cholesterol, AST, ALT, electrolytes, BUN, creatinine, random glucose, amylase and lipase, and DNA for fragile X.
So anyways, Ethan sits still through the whole thing with no flinching. I asked First Phlebotomist to uncover his arm at some point since I wanted to see his reaction. She waited a minute or two and then moved her hand. He looked at his arm and did a reaction of "Ehh.. ehh", almost like a reaction of a bug or something being on his arm. She covers it and he stops. When she takes the needle out of his arm, he made no movement, until she uncovers his arm and he sees the band aid. Then he begins to pick at it. We tell him that no, he needs to leave it on. She takes off the band from his arm and he makes the "ehh" sound again.
She tells him he's all done. His reaction? He jumps into her arms and gives her a big hug and a kiss, then DANCES/moonwalks out of the room and up to the reception desk and asks for the lollipop. The receptionist actually thinks that he hasn't had his blood work done since she never heard him make a noise. The Phlebotomist had to come out and explain that no, he did have the work done. The office ended up amazed.
Liam was the opposite and about killed the nurse when she touched his arm to look for a vein. Cried all through the draw and most of the rest of the day -- even to the point of freaking out tonight when he took the band-aid off and saw the "hole" from the blood work.
I'm not sure which is worse -- Mr OverReaction or Mr UnderReaction! It was nice not having to hold Ethan down kicking and screaming, but was disturbing to see him SO relaxed....
Let's start with the blood work the boys had on the 9th. I figured I'd take them then since Liam didn't have school and we'd have the whole day to
Liam decided to "let" his brother go first since he had had blood work done last year and remembered it too well. Ethan never had blood work done before, so didn't know what he was in for. Liam had worked himself up into quite a tizzy. I had hoped that if I had told him about the blood work and reminded him that, while it hurt last time, it didn't take long and he survived it. I'm certain had he been on his regular medicine I would have been able to reason with him and calm him down. Unfortunately he was NOT to be reasoned with.
So he was sent off to the Sibling Center and I went upstairs with Ethan. Ethan *danced* up the stairs... singing "I'm getting blood work done! YAY!". Needless to say, people were very amused. We checked into the office and he got all excited. The registration girl asked if he knew what was happening and I said nope. He saw the lollipops on the desk and asked for one. The girl told him that he'd get one when he was done.
So we went to the waiting room and played with Liam's Leapster Explorer. When they called him into the office, he ran in and was all excited. The Phlebotomist saw on the paperwork that the doctor was Dr Faber, so asked if Ethan was Autistic. I told her we were unsure and explained that his "current diagnosis" was Disruptive Behavior Disorder NOS, Rule Out of PDD (Pervasive Development Disorder), Sensory Issues, and we're not totally sure on other things. She asked him to go into the room that was 1+1. Ethan looked at her. Laughed, said "That's two" and walked to the second door. She asked him what 2 + 5 was and he immediately answered 7. She just smiled like she totally knew what she was dealing with.
As an aside, the girls at Children's Hospital are *wonderful*. They always have two girls per kid. One is changing the vials and the other stays only with the child and the needle. This makes it perfectly wonderful for kids who fight. I love it :)
Anyways, so Ethan DANCES into the room and jumps into the chair (it's like a normal adult chair for blood collecting, but it's double size so the parent can sit beside) and starts playing the Leapster Explorer. I sit down beside him and the first Phlebotomist tells the second one that he'll be a bit interesting of a case. She said that he probably won't notice the needle at all or he'll over react. Second Phlebotomist seems to not believe her. I told them that they could do whatever they needed to -- don't worry about hiding blood from me or making him cry. I'm used to the routine *lol* (My Godson used to be quite an experience to get blood draws from... *shudders at the memories of 4 adults laying on him to do a blood draw at 3-4 years of age)
First Phlebotomist starts to explain to Ethan what they're going to do. He won't put down the Leapster Explorer, so we have to take it away to get him into position. He looks at them a bit odd when they put the rubber band on his arm, but nothing big. When they put the needle into his arm he says "ouch." and then does a bit of "ehhh" and mild whining. First Phlebotomist puts her hand up and covers the needle so he can't see it. He acts like nothing is happening. At all. He starts to try to get up and we have to remind him that no, he has to sit. I pull out the Leapster Explorer and told him that he can play it with his left hand. He then proceeds to play with his left hand like nothing is happening.
It was almost freaky to watch him. At one point I almost got up to video it with my cell phone because I was in such shock. First Phlebotomist looks at me and says "He's Aspergers isn't he?" Second Phlebotomist couldn't believe it at all. She says she has been doing this for years and has never seen a kid act like nothing wrong. She's seen them be calm and do the "Ok, it will be over soon" routine, but never acting like nothing is going on as they move the needle. They did approximately 19 vials. Yes. Nineteen. Dr Faber's first blood work is extensive.
I'm pretty sure he did the same initial work up as he did for Liam's initial work up a year ago. This is what he checked for on Liam's: Serum copper, plasma zinc, lead level, selenium level, T cell subsets - CD3, CD4, CD8, CD19, CD4/CD8 ratio, quantitative serum immunoglobulins, CBC and diff with platelets, ESR (Sedimentation rate) , Tissue transglutaminase (tTGA) IgA antibody, antigliadin antiboties, antigluten IgG antibotides, anticasein IgG antibodies, antisoy IgG antibodies, total protein, albumin, calcium, phosphrous, alkaline phosphatase, ammonia, iron, TIBC, percent Fe saturation, ferritin, free T4, cholesterol, AST, ALT, electrolytes, BUN, creatinine, random glucose, amylase and lipase, and DNA for fragile X.
So anyways, Ethan sits still through the whole thing with no flinching. I asked First Phlebotomist to uncover his arm at some point since I wanted to see his reaction. She waited a minute or two and then moved her hand. He looked at his arm and did a reaction of "Ehh.. ehh", almost like a reaction of a bug or something being on his arm. She covers it and he stops. When she takes the needle out of his arm, he made no movement, until she uncovers his arm and he sees the band aid. Then he begins to pick at it. We tell him that no, he needs to leave it on. She takes off the band from his arm and he makes the "ehh" sound again.
She tells him he's all done. His reaction? He jumps into her arms and gives her a big hug and a kiss, then DANCES/moonwalks out of the room and up to the reception desk and asks for the lollipop. The receptionist actually thinks that he hasn't had his blood work done since she never heard him make a noise. The Phlebotomist had to come out and explain that no, he did have the work done. The office ended up amazed.
Liam was the opposite and about killed the nurse when she touched his arm to look for a vein. Cried all through the draw and most of the rest of the day -- even to the point of freaking out tonight when he took the band-aid off and saw the "hole" from the blood work.
I'm not sure which is worse -- Mr OverReaction or Mr UnderReaction! It was nice not having to hold Ethan down kicking and screaming, but was disturbing to see him SO relaxed....
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Yes, I am still here...
Yeah, I haven't posted much in a while. I'm quite the slacker, I know. I keep intending to post and then one thing or another comes up and then I end up forgetting about it or I'll do a short status update on FaceBook and leave it at that. I still need to do a full update on the cell phone drama and a few other things but those aren't going to happen tonight.
I figure a good way to get back on track for what I had planned on this blog being about, would be to post something cute that Liam did today. Now we're having medication issues with Liam (again, another long post that I'm going to try to get to this week), so Liam didn't have a dose of medicine yesterday so I could make sure he had a dose today (tomorrow we're just paying out of pocket to get more for him). Anyways, because of this I think Liam was a bit off. So this is what happened...
Since I only have one paper left for class, and that's due tomorrow, I decided to turn on some music and fold some laundry and stuff tonight to clear my head so I can work better tomorrow. I ended up going through a pile of clothes that I've been digging through for laundry for way too long. Got a bunch folded and put away in drawers.
After I had a good amount done, Liam comes up to me and says:
"Mommy! Your room looks SO nice with your laundry all folded and put away and stuff picked up! You have done SUCH a good job! I am SO proud of you Mommy! I love you!" and gives me a HUGE hug.
*waits for everyone to stop "oohing" and "aahing"*
Now, this would have been the sweetest thing I had heard in all of my life IF I was not sitting on the toilet and wiping my behind while he was hugging and praising me. *snort*
I told him thank you and asked him if he could please wait until I was done in the bathroom and then that would be a more appropriate time to tell me that. He seemed a bit confused, but stood outside of the bathroom door as asked him to. He tried pouncing one more time before I could wash my hands and I had to again explain that no, this was NOT an appropriate time.
I have also decided to implement something similar to what our BSC and another friend told us about. We're going to do a "reward book" for both kids. It's pretty much a booklet made out of construction paper with lines dividing it into 20 squares per page. I am going to give them stickers anytime that I catch them doing something nice/polite/following a rule/etc. It's not going to be everytime they do something, but at random times. We started it this afternoon and so far it's done pretty well. I'm hoping that focusing on this might help both of them -- for Liam I'm going to be focusing on being nice to Ethan, helping around the house, doing homework, getting "green days" in school. For Ethan, I'm going to be focusing on safety rules, being nice to Liam, helping, being nice to Tiger, etc.
I'm not sure what to make the rewards at the end of the page. I was thinking maybe 50 cents to be able to spend when we go somewhere that has those little toy machines (like gumball machines). They love those silly things. Or maybe when they fill the page they get to pick where we go for dinner or get a "no chore" evening or something. I'll have to keep thinking on it. For now they are content with earning stickers without a concrete award. I am sure this will change as they approach the end of the page. Thankfully 20 things should at least get me through a day or so ;)
I figure a good way to get back on track for what I had planned on this blog being about, would be to post something cute that Liam did today. Now we're having medication issues with Liam (again, another long post that I'm going to try to get to this week), so Liam didn't have a dose of medicine yesterday so I could make sure he had a dose today (tomorrow we're just paying out of pocket to get more for him). Anyways, because of this I think Liam was a bit off. So this is what happened...
Since I only have one paper left for class, and that's due tomorrow, I decided to turn on some music and fold some laundry and stuff tonight to clear my head so I can work better tomorrow. I ended up going through a pile of clothes that I've been digging through for laundry for way too long. Got a bunch folded and put away in drawers.
After I had a good amount done, Liam comes up to me and says:
"Mommy! Your room looks SO nice with your laundry all folded and put away and stuff picked up! You have done SUCH a good job! I am SO proud of you Mommy! I love you!" and gives me a HUGE hug.
*waits for everyone to stop "oohing" and "aahing"*
Now, this would have been the sweetest thing I had heard in all of my life IF I was not sitting on the toilet and wiping my behind while he was hugging and praising me. *snort*
I told him thank you and asked him if he could please wait until I was done in the bathroom and then that would be a more appropriate time to tell me that. He seemed a bit confused, but stood outside of the bathroom door as asked him to. He tried pouncing one more time before I could wash my hands and I had to again explain that no, this was NOT an appropriate time.
I have also decided to implement something similar to what our BSC and another friend told us about. We're going to do a "reward book" for both kids. It's pretty much a booklet made out of construction paper with lines dividing it into 20 squares per page. I am going to give them stickers anytime that I catch them doing something nice/polite/following a rule/etc. It's not going to be everytime they do something, but at random times. We started it this afternoon and so far it's done pretty well. I'm hoping that focusing on this might help both of them -- for Liam I'm going to be focusing on being nice to Ethan, helping around the house, doing homework, getting "green days" in school. For Ethan, I'm going to be focusing on safety rules, being nice to Liam, helping, being nice to Tiger, etc.
I'm not sure what to make the rewards at the end of the page. I was thinking maybe 50 cents to be able to spend when we go somewhere that has those little toy machines (like gumball machines). They love those silly things. Or maybe when they fill the page they get to pick where we go for dinner or get a "no chore" evening or something. I'll have to keep thinking on it. For now they are content with earning stickers without a concrete award. I am sure this will change as they approach the end of the page. Thankfully 20 things should at least get me through a day or so ;)
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Last weekend for Barefoot Books' Summer Sale!!
Save more than 50% on some of our best selling books! But, check them out quickly -- the sale ends August 1st!
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Liam amusement...
I've been meaning to start recording more of the kid-stuff that happens and I haven't been keeping up on that much... Here's an amusing antidote from tonight:
So I'm sitting here in my office, watching Ghost Hunters with Liam and poking on Facebook before bed (gotta make sure my farm, frontier, island, and monster backyard are all safe before bedtime!) Liam walks out of the room to go to the bathroom.
I hear the toilet flush (we have the new dual flush toilets, so the toilet flushes really quickly and quietly).
Then I hear Tiger (our cat for those of you out of the loop) SCREAM and race past me from the direction of the bathroom. She almost takes out my foot and barely misses embedding herself into the front of the TV and then the front door in her panic to get away from whatever just scared the everloving piss out of her.
Before she finishes bouncing off the walls, Liam comes running out of the bathroom. He's PANTING and white as a sheet (ok, whiter than a sheet since the kid is already pale as all get out). He starts going "Mama, Mama, Mama!". I asked him what was wrong and then he saw Tiger and started breathing again...
Apparently he went into the bathroom without turning on the light. Tiger was attacking some random piece of fuzz and didn't notice he was in there. Liam then flushed the toilet, which scared the piss out of Tiger... who then scared the piss out of Liam.
Thankfully, Liam had already peed...
So I'm sitting here in my office, watching Ghost Hunters with Liam and poking on Facebook before bed (gotta make sure my farm, frontier, island, and monster backyard are all safe before bedtime!) Liam walks out of the room to go to the bathroom.
I hear the toilet flush (we have the new dual flush toilets, so the toilet flushes really quickly and quietly).
Then I hear Tiger (our cat for those of you out of the loop) SCREAM and race past me from the direction of the bathroom. She almost takes out my foot and barely misses embedding herself into the front of the TV and then the front door in her panic to get away from whatever just scared the everloving piss out of her.
Before she finishes bouncing off the walls, Liam comes running out of the bathroom. He's PANTING and white as a sheet (ok, whiter than a sheet since the kid is already pale as all get out). He starts going "Mama, Mama, Mama!". I asked him what was wrong and then he saw Tiger and started breathing again...
Apparently he went into the bathroom without turning on the light. Tiger was attacking some random piece of fuzz and didn't notice he was in there. Liam then flushed the toilet, which scared the piss out of Tiger... who then scared the piss out of Liam.
Thankfully, Liam had already peed...
Full story of what happened to my cell phone
I purchased the Cliq in Feb of this year. Between Feb and May I was having issues with the phone. After troubleshooting, the tech authorized a replacement Cliq. The replacement phone (#2) worked very well (and I do like the phone itself) until approximately a week ago when it began rebooting randomly and getting very warm again. Last Friday battery drained in 20 mins. I called customer service and explained I had been starting to have minor issues like before, and then the battery drain. They authorized another replacement to be sent out to me. The next replacement Cliq (#3) arrived this morning at 11am. From 11:30am until 2:00pm the phone rebooted 20 times and had a few other issues
I first called customer service and they said they could either replace with the exact same phone (so that would be Cliq #4 in 5 months time) or they could replace with a Blackberry 9700. I told them I was wary of another Cliq since this one didn't even last two hours and would be the 4th phone in 5 months. I also told them that I didn't really want a Blackberry since it didn't have the features (Android system) that I purchased this phone for. I told them I'd talk to my husband and then I'd call back.
I talked to my husband and he was also confused on why they'd replace a Motorola Android phone with a Blackberry that doesn't have the same features. I told him I was going to call back, so he asked me to ask about a replacement with the Cliq XT or getting a brand new Cliq instead of refurbished. I called back and spoke to a manager.
He said that my warranty only covers the exact make and model. He said that the Blackberry was offered because it was an overstock in the warehouse and their "handset specialists" only allow overstock as a replacement. He also said that they could keep replacing my Cliq as many times as I need. The third option he gave was that I could “upgrade” to a new phone. I’d still be paying the balance on the non-working phone ($300) for the next 15 months, but I could use the rest of my $300 credit available on my account to purchase an additional device. I told him I didn’t think it was too fair to continue to pay on the phone that is defective, he pointed out that he would send me another refurbished Cliq instead. I asked if I could be sent a new device and he said they are not available in the warehouse – only Blackberrys are available – and a new device could malfunction anyways, so there was no difference.
When I asked about returning the defective device and paying additional for a different device, he told me that I was just experiencing "Buyer's Remorse". I told him what the definition of buyer's remorse is, but I'd like to put it here also:
"Buyer's remorse is the feeling of regret after a purchase. It is frequently associated with the purchase of higher value items such as a car or house. It may stem from a sense of not wishing to be wrong, of guilt over extravagance or from feeling that one has been persuaded by a salesman." I explained to him that I do NOT have buyer's remorse. I didn't just purchase it and change my mind. I love this phone -- when it works. I purchased it and went through 3 versions of it in 5 months and I still do not have a working phone. I didn't "regret" my purchase until today when I received my third phone in the mail and it didn't work properly.
I finally let him send me a replacement Cliq since I had no other choice. He said that I couldn’t have a new Cliq or Cliq XT from a store since the stores are independent and they can’t get replacements from them – only from the warehouse. He waived the $19 (plus tax) expedited shipping fee for phone #4.
Oh, and he also mentioned that I was free to sell the replacement Cliq that I’d be receiving in the mail.
I first called customer service and they said they could either replace with the exact same phone (so that would be Cliq #4 in 5 months time) or they could replace with a Blackberry 9700. I told them I was wary of another Cliq since this one didn't even last two hours and would be the 4th phone in 5 months. I also told them that I didn't really want a Blackberry since it didn't have the features (Android system) that I purchased this phone for. I told them I'd talk to my husband and then I'd call back.
I talked to my husband and he was also confused on why they'd replace a Motorola Android phone with a Blackberry that doesn't have the same features. I told him I was going to call back, so he asked me to ask about a replacement with the Cliq XT or getting a brand new Cliq instead of refurbished. I called back and spoke to a manager.
He said that my warranty only covers the exact make and model. He said that the Blackberry was offered because it was an overstock in the warehouse and their "handset specialists" only allow overstock as a replacement. He also said that they could keep replacing my Cliq as many times as I need. The third option he gave was that I could “upgrade” to a new phone. I’d still be paying the balance on the non-working phone ($300) for the next 15 months, but I could use the rest of my $300 credit available on my account to purchase an additional device. I told him I didn’t think it was too fair to continue to pay on the phone that is defective, he pointed out that he would send me another refurbished Cliq instead. I asked if I could be sent a new device and he said they are not available in the warehouse – only Blackberrys are available – and a new device could malfunction anyways, so there was no difference.
When I asked about returning the defective device and paying additional for a different device, he told me that I was just experiencing "Buyer's Remorse". I told him what the definition of buyer's remorse is, but I'd like to put it here also:
"Buyer's remorse is the feeling of regret after a purchase. It is frequently associated with the purchase of higher value items such as a car or house. It may stem from a sense of not wishing to be wrong, of guilt over extravagance or from feeling that one has been persuaded by a salesman." I explained to him that I do NOT have buyer's remorse. I didn't just purchase it and change my mind. I love this phone -- when it works. I purchased it and went through 3 versions of it in 5 months and I still do not have a working phone. I didn't "regret" my purchase until today when I received my third phone in the mail and it didn't work properly.
I finally let him send me a replacement Cliq since I had no other choice. He said that I couldn’t have a new Cliq or Cliq XT from a store since the stores are independent and they can’t get replacements from them – only from the warehouse. He waived the $19 (plus tax) expedited shipping fee for phone #4.
Oh, and he also mentioned that I was free to sell the replacement Cliq that I’d be receiving in the mail.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
What am I doing wrong?
I swear I have to be doing something wrong with Ethan. I've gotten to the point that there can't be any other solution than the fact that I'm screwing up.
He flushes toys down the toilet, and has done so as recently as Feb/March/April -- possibly more recent. We've had to replace two toilets this week. One had a Penguins of Madagascar penguin toy from McDonalds stuck in, and the other one had Liam's rattle from when he was a baby. It's the rattle that's in this picture from when Ethan was a baby http://i84.photobucket.com/albums/k19/Jade1018/Liam%20and%20Ethan/2006/HPIM0610.jpg
Karl made a big deal about showing him how the toys BROKE the toilet. We pointed out that because of the toys in the toilet, we had to buy new toilets. Karl showed him the toys that had to be thrown out (or in the case of the penguin, the feet of the toy sticking out of the bottom of the toilet), and the boys saw how hard it was for the new toilet to be installed. Ethan's reaction was to laugh. He thought it was a huge joke.
He writes all over *everything*. Earlier this week when I was doing homework, he wrote all over the wall (the only one that hadn't already been destroyed) in his bedroom and all over Liam's bed. He, of course, got in trouble and acted like we had just killed his pet dog in-front of him and made him eat the thing. Next morning he was up and trying to write on things again.
Today I felt REALLY sick, like I had been hit by a truck. I have this problem once a month a few days before my period. Anyways, I was laying down whether I wanted to or not (had been sitting up talking to Liam and literally fell asleep) and Liam comes up screaming. He shows me a Zhu Zhu pet baby that Ethan had drawn all over with permanent marker. This is the limited edition stupid one that came with a set. Now we looked all over for the stupid critters and paid more than we should have for these silly things. Now it's covered in marker. I tell Liam to send Ethan upstairs. Ethan doesn't want to come, but when he does, he's giggling his butt off. I ask him what he did and he said "nothing" and then said he drew on the baby. I ask why and he starts laughing and says "Because". I asked for a better answer and he just laughed. I asked if he was going to do it again and he just laughed. So he got put into time out. I put him in his room and closed the door. That was a little before 4pm. He screamed until he fell asleep. We didn't hear from him again until 7pm.
He got up and came downstairs. I asked him if he was ready to talk and he curled up against me like he was sleepy. I said I'd cuddle him if he talked first. He threw himself on the floor and cried for 5-10 mins.
I told him he needed to talk to me first before he could go play. He takes another 10ish mins of crying before he talks. I ask why I put him in time out and he tells me because he drew on the baby. I ask if he was going to do it again, and he says no. I tell him that since he can't stop drawing on things, all markers/pens/crayons/etc will be put up and they will have to be asked for when anyone wants to use them. This causes another 15 minute screaming fit.
He also hurt the cat today and thought it was funny. Some of you know the issues we had last year with Tiger and her broken leg. As of now, you can't tell her leg was ever broken, except she sits with it sticking out a little bit. She runs, jumps, gets under your feet, etc just like any other cat. Ethan was running to the door and chasing Tiger and stepped on her paw. Tiger did a normal "hiss-crank" that a cat does when they get stepped on. Ethan giggles and JUMPS on her leg again. This makes Tiger REALLY pissed and she makes the hiss that means she's going to kill something. I wouldn't have blamed her for scratching him, but she didn't. She limped around for a minute or two as Ethan laughed. I went to check on her before yelling at him, and she seemed OK after a little bit. Ethan got yelled at and wasn't too happy to lose his toy while we drove to pick Liam up from school. Tiger seemed to be moving around and doing good by the time we got home.
Now I'm trying to figure out what I'm doing wrong here. I don't want to hear "he's a boy and they do that" because they DON'T. I have friends who have boys who don't have drawings all over their house and broken toilets. I grew up with almost entirely boys in my neighborhood. Every single one of their houses were spotless and they never drew on or broke toys. These boys were pretty bad at rough housing too. I am tired of hearing "he's a boy" or "yeah, my kid does that" because I just don't see it happening at other people's houses. I haven't heard of ONE of my friends/family/neighbors having to replace 2 toilets at once due to their kids flushing things and breaking them. I haven't been in a house in my life that has drawings all over the walls and drawings all over toys, furniture, tables, etc. therefore I completely refuse to believe this is "normal".
I also refuse to believe that "all boys run into traffic" or do other dangerous things and find it funny. AND I don't believe that "all boys" jump on cats and hurt them and find it funny. If this was the case, we wouldn't have males in society. :P They'd have all killed themselves off by now.
I am tired and stressed about this. We leave for Oregon on Wednesday morning and all I can think about is that we'll be out there and Ethan will flush stuff down relative's toilets and break them or that he'll draw all over their walls, furniture, tables, etc with markers and they'll have to repaint their walls like we are going to have to. Or he'll destroy things on the airplane. Or he'll destroy things at restaurants or places we go to eat or do touristy stuff at.
*sigh* Liam had went through this "phase" way before he was 4. He was in and out of it when he was 3ish. His "phase" didn't last nearly this long and wasn't nearly this destructive. When you talked to Liam, you could tell he was "getting" it. With Ethan, I might as well be talking to Oster-bunny. I think he'd understand better.
He flushes toys down the toilet, and has done so as recently as Feb/March/April -- possibly more recent. We've had to replace two toilets this week. One had a Penguins of Madagascar penguin toy from McDonalds stuck in, and the other one had Liam's rattle from when he was a baby. It's the rattle that's in this picture from when Ethan was a baby http://i84.photobucket.com/albums/k19/Jade1018/Liam%20and%20Ethan/2006/HPIM0610.jpg
Karl made a big deal about showing him how the toys BROKE the toilet. We pointed out that because of the toys in the toilet, we had to buy new toilets. Karl showed him the toys that had to be thrown out (or in the case of the penguin, the feet of the toy sticking out of the bottom of the toilet), and the boys saw how hard it was for the new toilet to be installed. Ethan's reaction was to laugh. He thought it was a huge joke.
He writes all over *everything*. Earlier this week when I was doing homework, he wrote all over the wall (the only one that hadn't already been destroyed) in his bedroom and all over Liam's bed. He, of course, got in trouble and acted like we had just killed his pet dog in-front of him and made him eat the thing. Next morning he was up and trying to write on things again.
Today I felt REALLY sick, like I had been hit by a truck. I have this problem once a month a few days before my period. Anyways, I was laying down whether I wanted to or not (had been sitting up talking to Liam and literally fell asleep) and Liam comes up screaming. He shows me a Zhu Zhu pet baby that Ethan had drawn all over with permanent marker. This is the limited edition stupid one that came with a set. Now we looked all over for the stupid critters and paid more than we should have for these silly things. Now it's covered in marker. I tell Liam to send Ethan upstairs. Ethan doesn't want to come, but when he does, he's giggling his butt off. I ask him what he did and he said "nothing" and then said he drew on the baby. I ask why and he starts laughing and says "Because". I asked for a better answer and he just laughed. I asked if he was going to do it again and he just laughed. So he got put into time out. I put him in his room and closed the door. That was a little before 4pm. He screamed until he fell asleep. We didn't hear from him again until 7pm.
He got up and came downstairs. I asked him if he was ready to talk and he curled up against me like he was sleepy. I said I'd cuddle him if he talked first. He threw himself on the floor and cried for 5-10 mins.
I told him he needed to talk to me first before he could go play. He takes another 10ish mins of crying before he talks. I ask why I put him in time out and he tells me because he drew on the baby. I ask if he was going to do it again, and he says no. I tell him that since he can't stop drawing on things, all markers/pens/crayons/etc will be put up and they will have to be asked for when anyone wants to use them. This causes another 15 minute screaming fit.
He also hurt the cat today and thought it was funny. Some of you know the issues we had last year with Tiger and her broken leg. As of now, you can't tell her leg was ever broken, except she sits with it sticking out a little bit. She runs, jumps, gets under your feet, etc just like any other cat. Ethan was running to the door and chasing Tiger and stepped on her paw. Tiger did a normal "hiss-crank" that a cat does when they get stepped on. Ethan giggles and JUMPS on her leg again. This makes Tiger REALLY pissed and she makes the hiss that means she's going to kill something. I wouldn't have blamed her for scratching him, but she didn't. She limped around for a minute or two as Ethan laughed. I went to check on her before yelling at him, and she seemed OK after a little bit. Ethan got yelled at and wasn't too happy to lose his toy while we drove to pick Liam up from school. Tiger seemed to be moving around and doing good by the time we got home.
Now I'm trying to figure out what I'm doing wrong here. I don't want to hear "he's a boy and they do that" because they DON'T. I have friends who have boys who don't have drawings all over their house and broken toilets. I grew up with almost entirely boys in my neighborhood. Every single one of their houses were spotless and they never drew on or broke toys. These boys were pretty bad at rough housing too. I am tired of hearing "he's a boy" or "yeah, my kid does that" because I just don't see it happening at other people's houses. I haven't heard of ONE of my friends/family/neighbors having to replace 2 toilets at once due to their kids flushing things and breaking them. I haven't been in a house in my life that has drawings all over the walls and drawings all over toys, furniture, tables, etc. therefore I completely refuse to believe this is "normal".
I also refuse to believe that "all boys run into traffic" or do other dangerous things and find it funny. AND I don't believe that "all boys" jump on cats and hurt them and find it funny. If this was the case, we wouldn't have males in society. :P They'd have all killed themselves off by now.
I am tired and stressed about this. We leave for Oregon on Wednesday morning and all I can think about is that we'll be out there and Ethan will flush stuff down relative's toilets and break them or that he'll draw all over their walls, furniture, tables, etc with markers and they'll have to repaint their walls like we are going to have to. Or he'll destroy things on the airplane. Or he'll destroy things at restaurants or places we go to eat or do touristy stuff at.
*sigh* Liam had went through this "phase" way before he was 4. He was in and out of it when he was 3ish. His "phase" didn't last nearly this long and wasn't nearly this destructive. When you talked to Liam, you could tell he was "getting" it. With Ethan, I might as well be talking to Oster-bunny. I think he'd understand better.
Monday, May 24, 2010
Warning: Abortion Protester Rant To Follow.
First off, I want to clarify something. This rant has NOTHING to do with abortion itself. I don't care if you're for or against it. It doesn't matter if I am for or against it. That makes no bearing on what I am going to rant about. This rant is not directed towards anyone who is against abortion. Only those imbeciles who have 4-foot tall posters of dead babies in public places where I have to see them with my children.
I was driving back from Ethan's speech appointment today and got to the intersection of Washington Boulevard and Allegheny River Boulevard:
View Larger Map
This is a well-traveled road at this time of day. Usually we wait through at least one traffic light if not two. And, as you can see from the map, it's right by the Pittsburgh Zoo. A very well-traveled area.
Many times there are random churches/fire departments/etc collecting money at the light. Today I saw the people dodging traffic with their large buckets for money... and I saw something else.
A 5 foot tall picture of a dead fetus.
This picture was being held by someone who was screaming something about murdering babies, while waving this 5 ft by probably 3 or 4 ft tall sign around into the turning lane of traffic.
My first thought is how to distract my 4 year old in the back seat. I don't want him seeing images of dead babies. It's bad enough that I'm going to have nightmares, I don't want him waking up in the middle of the night screaming about dead babies.
I thought at first maybe it was just one person... (Yes, I know. They are never alone. They always come in droves.) Then I saw the rest of the group... in all I saw 5 of the 5x4 signs, 2 signs of what looked like a premature baby in an incubator that was a bit smaller (probably 3x4), and then 2 more of dead babies in trash cans.
As the guy came by my car to ask for money, I had to wind my window up tight. I was afraid that I'd either spit in his bucket or puke in it.
In hindsight I almost wish I would have done one or the other rather than just sat there trying to find something in the car to keep Ethan's eyes inside the car instead of outside.
As I drove through the intersection, I noticed one of the guys with the 4 ft tall signs. He had this big shit-eating grin on his face. Made me want to get out of the car and shake my finger at him and scold him like my grandmother would do to us when we were little and did something rude to someone else.
What I don't get is HOW these people can think that it's right to show these horrific signs to people driving down the road (or ANYONE for that matter)? What kind of God do they believe in who thinks that showing graphic signs of death to someone's child who is driving by in a car is acceptable?
It's honestly bad enough when they picket Magee Hospital. I was there once when I was in pre-term labor with Liam. I drove around the corner and saw dead babies on signs. Now that's a wonderful sight to see when you're already afraid that your baby will be born too early and die. But this isn't even a medical establishment. This is a STREET. Near the ZOO. Near a BIKE PARK. I mean, WTF!?
Don't they think of the fact that some of the people driving past would have LOST babies due to things other than abortions? Some of those people might have had children die in car accidents or die of illness or "natural causes"? Some of those people might not be able to have children at all, and seeing pictures of dead babies could be traumatizing?
I can only imagine what would have happened had Liam been in the car with me. I would then have to explain to an almost 7 year old on the Autistic Spectrum why these people were yelling at us (he would have taken it personally, so really they would be yelling at HIM). He would want to know why they are calling him a murderer. Why they think he either killed or is going to kill babies.
UGH! It pisses me off so bad. (If you couldn't tell already *lol*)
There are very few times when I will be this pissed off at something, but I'd love to see these protesters burn in whatever hell they think that the person having (or doing) the abortion burns in.
I'd like to see what their reactions would be if their children had to look at pictures of dead people as they left the zoo for the day? Would they like it if their child was coming home after an afternoon in the hospital and saw people carrying large signs of dead infants, children, or adults?
I wonder what percentage of people had their minds changed today as they were standing along the intersection of route 8 and route 130 today? How many babies did they 'save'? Or did they just make themselves look more like idiots who don't actually care about anyone at all, let alone the babies they are supposed to be protecting?
I was driving back from Ethan's speech appointment today and got to the intersection of Washington Boulevard and Allegheny River Boulevard:
View Larger Map
This is a well-traveled road at this time of day. Usually we wait through at least one traffic light if not two. And, as you can see from the map, it's right by the Pittsburgh Zoo. A very well-traveled area.
Many times there are random churches/fire departments/etc collecting money at the light. Today I saw the people dodging traffic with their large buckets for money... and I saw something else.
A 5 foot tall picture of a dead fetus.
This picture was being held by someone who was screaming something about murdering babies, while waving this 5 ft by probably 3 or 4 ft tall sign around into the turning lane of traffic.
My first thought is how to distract my 4 year old in the back seat. I don't want him seeing images of dead babies. It's bad enough that I'm going to have nightmares, I don't want him waking up in the middle of the night screaming about dead babies.
I thought at first maybe it was just one person... (Yes, I know. They are never alone. They always come in droves.) Then I saw the rest of the group... in all I saw 5 of the 5x4 signs, 2 signs of what looked like a premature baby in an incubator that was a bit smaller (probably 3x4), and then 2 more of dead babies in trash cans.
As the guy came by my car to ask for money, I had to wind my window up tight. I was afraid that I'd either spit in his bucket or puke in it.
In hindsight I almost wish I would have done one or the other rather than just sat there trying to find something in the car to keep Ethan's eyes inside the car instead of outside.
As I drove through the intersection, I noticed one of the guys with the 4 ft tall signs. He had this big shit-eating grin on his face. Made me want to get out of the car and shake my finger at him and scold him like my grandmother would do to us when we were little and did something rude to someone else.
What I don't get is HOW these people can think that it's right to show these horrific signs to people driving down the road (or ANYONE for that matter)? What kind of God do they believe in who thinks that showing graphic signs of death to someone's child who is driving by in a car is acceptable?
It's honestly bad enough when they picket Magee Hospital. I was there once when I was in pre-term labor with Liam. I drove around the corner and saw dead babies on signs. Now that's a wonderful sight to see when you're already afraid that your baby will be born too early and die. But this isn't even a medical establishment. This is a STREET. Near the ZOO. Near a BIKE PARK. I mean, WTF!?
Don't they think of the fact that some of the people driving past would have LOST babies due to things other than abortions? Some of those people might have had children die in car accidents or die of illness or "natural causes"? Some of those people might not be able to have children at all, and seeing pictures of dead babies could be traumatizing?
I can only imagine what would have happened had Liam been in the car with me. I would then have to explain to an almost 7 year old on the Autistic Spectrum why these people were yelling at us (he would have taken it personally, so really they would be yelling at HIM). He would want to know why they are calling him a murderer. Why they think he either killed or is going to kill babies.
UGH! It pisses me off so bad. (If you couldn't tell already *lol*)
There are very few times when I will be this pissed off at something, but I'd love to see these protesters burn in whatever hell they think that the person having (or doing) the abortion burns in.
I'd like to see what their reactions would be if their children had to look at pictures of dead people as they left the zoo for the day? Would they like it if their child was coming home after an afternoon in the hospital and saw people carrying large signs of dead infants, children, or adults?
I wonder what percentage of people had their minds changed today as they were standing along the intersection of route 8 and route 130 today? How many babies did they 'save'? Or did they just make themselves look more like idiots who don't actually care about anyone at all, let alone the babies they are supposed to be protecting?
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Week of coolness
Some of you have already seen my posts about some of this on my FaceBook or Twitter, but I never actually wrote about all of it, so here we go ;)
On Sunday I went with a group of Pittsburgh Mom Bloggers to a very cool salon in Aspinwall, PA. Divinity Salon (http://www.divinity-salon.com/ their FaceBook page at http://www.facebook.com/?ref=logo#!/pages/Aspinwall-PA/Divinity-Salon/198723679164?ref=ts) is an absolutely beautiful salon. The staff was SO absolutely cool and everyone came out looking beyond excellent! Cooper organized all of this for us and she has wonderful before/after pics up on her site: http://beenthere.typepad.com/been_there/2010/05/hair-day.html
I've been wanting to get my second tattoo done for a while now. For those of you who don't know, when Ethan was about 6 months old or so, I had my first one done:
I love it, but wanted my next one to be more visible (to me! It's hard to see what's on your back). I spoke to my absolute favorite tattoo artist, the wonderful Bunny, and showed her my idea. She loved it and we started work on it yesterday.
Here is the initial outline:
and then we had some time to add in the first of the color:
It will be in full color when we are all done. This was about 2 hours of work. I'm absolutely thrilled with it so far and can't wait to see it done. Granted, I also can't wait to be able to sleep on my right side again at night *LOL*
On Sunday I went with a group of Pittsburgh Mom Bloggers to a very cool salon in Aspinwall, PA. Divinity Salon (http://www.divinity-salon.com/ their FaceBook page at http://www.facebook.com/?ref=logo#!/pages/Aspinwall-PA/Divinity-Salon/198723679164?ref=ts) is an absolutely beautiful salon. The staff was SO absolutely cool and everyone came out looking beyond excellent! Cooper organized all of this for us and she has wonderful before/after pics up on her site: http://beenthere.typepad.com/been_there/2010/05/hair-day.html
I've been wanting to get my second tattoo done for a while now. For those of you who don't know, when Ethan was about 6 months old or so, I had my first one done:
I love it, but wanted my next one to be more visible (to me! It's hard to see what's on your back). I spoke to my absolute favorite tattoo artist, the wonderful Bunny, and showed her my idea. She loved it and we started work on it yesterday.
Here is the initial outline:
and then we had some time to add in the first of the color:
It will be in full color when we are all done. This was about 2 hours of work. I'm absolutely thrilled with it so far and can't wait to see it done. Granted, I also can't wait to be able to sleep on my right side again at night *LOL*
ooohhh.. blog from cell phone??
hrm. I seem to have found a program so I can blog from the cell... lets see if I like this.
ooohhh.. blog from cell phone??
hrm. I seem to have found a program so I can blog from the cell... lets see if I like this.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Time for me to rant...
First off, this rant isn't directed to anyone. I'm not looking for answers. I'm not looking for any responses really. I just need to rant, and since this is what I made this blog for, I'm ranting. If you don't like it, don't read it. :P
I am frustrated to hell and back for a ton and a half of reasons.... I'm going to touch on a few of them and then probably add some more later as I need to.
~ Liam and Ethan have some difficult to control behaviors. They have a whole list of things that happen with mostly me (since I'm the one around them most of the time), a bit with Karl, or my Mom. Years ago Kelly and Cathy A saw a lot of Liam's behaviors when we were over at their house a lot of times. Last year in school, Liam's behaviors were seen way more than we wanted them to be... but the only doctor/therapist/etc who ever saw them was Dr Faber. And that was probably a combination of both kids trying to kill each other. All in all, I think that day just pretty much proved that I have no control over the children.
Ethan races into traffic. Hits things. Attacks the cat. Hits his head on the floor. Screams and repeats things exactly as he's heard them. Does all of these things and more, but his school sees nothing. Neither school has seen anything. I get these letters from the special ed teacher that really make me feel like I'm lying to them about his behaviors.
Hell, it makes ME think I'm imagining these behaviors! There's days that he acts so perfect for everyone else but me that I really begin to wonder if maybe I'm the problem. Karl points out all of the time how Ethan tantrums because I give in to him, and he used to point out how Liam's delays were because I wasn't a good enough Mom and didn't spend enough time with him...
~ So I have this wonderful thing called Respite Care we're signed up for. For those of you reading who don't know what it is, it's a service that is pretty much specialized babysitting for kids who have special needs. They're professionals who can be with the children from 2-8 hours. You can be on the premises or off. You can give them money to take public transit for activities with the kids. It's a really cool service.
However, I can't call them to give me a night off. Why? Because my house is an awful mess. I can't have someone come in and see how horribly gross my place is. I can't get my dishes caught up. My bathrooms are never clean. I have junk everywhere that I have no place to put, but can't get rid of since it's important stuff and things that I use. My clothes are never folded and put away since I have no comfortable place to sit or lay the clothes while folding them so I can move them to get to the cabinets/dressers behind the piles of laundry. (My bed is just a mattress on the floor and Karl refuses to get a frame for it since he has this "special" frame in mind... we've been laying on a bed on the floor for probably 2 years now)
Respite is my really only.. well, respite. Karl has D&D, band practice, choir practice, etc. I went out to Panera last night to have a few hours to myself to do homework and he really made me feel like dirt for leaving. Last time I talked to him about it, he just blew it off, so talking does no good.
Tho I do have to add that as I'm ranting about this (I was down a few paragraphs when this happened), Karl came home and we talked for quite some time about misc stuff that's been happening. Now he's running an errand for me and then picking up dinner... while he has the kids with him. So maybe he's made up for it for now! *LOL*
~ I have an absolutely wonderful opportunity to take this lactation consultant course this fall with Gini Baker. I've mentioned it before on here and half a dozen other places. I really want to take this course. This is the best option to be prepared to take the IBCLE test next summer. Gini is wonderful. She has more knowledge than anyone else I know. Training with her would be wonderful. Not to mention they have a deal with the board that reduces the number of hours needed because of all of the stuff she does. I have student loans to cover the tuition (or at least 90%ish of it). The problem is that it's in San Diego and I have to go approximately once a month from September through May/June. It's also 2 days of lectures, so I'd need to arrive one day, stay overnight, do day 1 lecture, overnight, day 2 lecture, and then leave that evening... which means I'd need a hotel or some sort of lodging along with the airfare. I can't afford the monthly airfare or lodging.
~ I found out about the "Summer Services" for Ethan.... This is what the letter says:
"Your child has been receiving early intervention services through the DART Program this year and as summer approaches and preschools are no longer in session, we are providing "Summer Services" to address your child's IEP goals. In addition to working on goals this summer, we want to continue to give your child the opportunity to play and interact with other children. The groups will be facilitated by the DART staff currently working with your child.
Date is Tuesdays from 8:45am-9:45am on the following dates June 15, June 22, July 20, July 27, and August 3.
Our focus will be to continue to address your child's specific needs and individual IEP goals, while at the same time introducing him/her to another small group experience. We hope that you will help us to create a fun and enjoyable summer learning experience for your child. If you have any questions or concerns regarding this opportunity, feel free to contact me."
So the SUMMER PROGRAM is 5 dates for an hour each day. It's not even every week for the summer. It's 15th, 22nd... skip the 29th, 6th, 13th... 20th, 27th, and 3rd.... What good is that going to do?
Well, I guess since he has no issues it probably won't matter :P
~ On the summer issue... We applied for the Mini-Grant for Liam. It's a grant for kids on the spectrum to help out with stuff. I applied for it for some camps for the summer: The Pgh Zoo, The Science Center, and The Carnegie Museum. The problem is we won't know for another week or two if we got the grant. Without the grant, we can't afford these programs. BUT if we wait on the grant to be approved, we might not get spots in the programs. My understanding is that the grant monies come in the form of a check for the place you're asking for... so I'm worried that if we can't get into the place, we're going to have this useless check... pretty much a doily. *sigh*
~ I'm also so tired of listening to and respecting other people's points of views and having them NOT listen to and respect mine. I try to listen to everyone's point of view. I feel that you can always learn something new and even if your points don't mesh, it's useful to know why someone doesn't agree with you. BUT if I spend the time to listen to you, I expect you to listen to me. I don't expect you to agree with me, just respect my opinion.
~ I also am annoyed that I keep forgetting to give the boys the supplements that Dr Faber wants them to have. I have them here. They are sitting right here. I can see them from where I sit. BUT they either hate the taste or I forget to give them to them. *sigh* It's so frustrating.
I could go on for a bit longer i'm sure, but this is probably long enough for now. After all of that I actually feel a lot better. I'm going to finish up my paper on the "Importance of Infant and Toddler Nutrition", and then take a bath with my new soap from one of my vendors, Sheepish Grins. I have a "Green Tea" Goats Milk Soap and an "Oatmeal, Milk and Honey" one.
I am frustrated to hell and back for a ton and a half of reasons.... I'm going to touch on a few of them and then probably add some more later as I need to.
~ Liam and Ethan have some difficult to control behaviors. They have a whole list of things that happen with mostly me (since I'm the one around them most of the time), a bit with Karl, or my Mom. Years ago Kelly and Cathy A saw a lot of Liam's behaviors when we were over at their house a lot of times. Last year in school, Liam's behaviors were seen way more than we wanted them to be... but the only doctor/therapist/etc who ever saw them was Dr Faber. And that was probably a combination of both kids trying to kill each other. All in all, I think that day just pretty much proved that I have no control over the children.
Ethan races into traffic. Hits things. Attacks the cat. Hits his head on the floor. Screams and repeats things exactly as he's heard them. Does all of these things and more, but his school sees nothing. Neither school has seen anything. I get these letters from the special ed teacher that really make me feel like I'm lying to them about his behaviors.
Hell, it makes ME think I'm imagining these behaviors! There's days that he acts so perfect for everyone else but me that I really begin to wonder if maybe I'm the problem. Karl points out all of the time how Ethan tantrums because I give in to him, and he used to point out how Liam's delays were because I wasn't a good enough Mom and didn't spend enough time with him...
~ So I have this wonderful thing called Respite Care we're signed up for. For those of you reading who don't know what it is, it's a service that is pretty much specialized babysitting for kids who have special needs. They're professionals who can be with the children from 2-8 hours. You can be on the premises or off. You can give them money to take public transit for activities with the kids. It's a really cool service.
However, I can't call them to give me a night off. Why? Because my house is an awful mess. I can't have someone come in and see how horribly gross my place is. I can't get my dishes caught up. My bathrooms are never clean. I have junk everywhere that I have no place to put, but can't get rid of since it's important stuff and things that I use. My clothes are never folded and put away since I have no comfortable place to sit or lay the clothes while folding them so I can move them to get to the cabinets/dressers behind the piles of laundry. (My bed is just a mattress on the floor and Karl refuses to get a frame for it since he has this "special" frame in mind... we've been laying on a bed on the floor for probably 2 years now)
Respite is my really only.. well, respite. Karl has D&D, band practice, choir practice, etc. I went out to Panera last night to have a few hours to myself to do homework and he really made me feel like dirt for leaving. Last time I talked to him about it, he just blew it off, so talking does no good.
Tho I do have to add that as I'm ranting about this (I was down a few paragraphs when this happened), Karl came home and we talked for quite some time about misc stuff that's been happening. Now he's running an errand for me and then picking up dinner... while he has the kids with him. So maybe he's made up for it for now! *LOL*
~ I have an absolutely wonderful opportunity to take this lactation consultant course this fall with Gini Baker. I've mentioned it before on here and half a dozen other places. I really want to take this course. This is the best option to be prepared to take the IBCLE test next summer. Gini is wonderful. She has more knowledge than anyone else I know. Training with her would be wonderful. Not to mention they have a deal with the board that reduces the number of hours needed because of all of the stuff she does. I have student loans to cover the tuition (or at least 90%ish of it). The problem is that it's in San Diego and I have to go approximately once a month from September through May/June. It's also 2 days of lectures, so I'd need to arrive one day, stay overnight, do day 1 lecture, overnight, day 2 lecture, and then leave that evening... which means I'd need a hotel or some sort of lodging along with the airfare. I can't afford the monthly airfare or lodging.
~ I found out about the "Summer Services" for Ethan.... This is what the letter says:
"Your child has been receiving early intervention services through the DART Program this year and as summer approaches and preschools are no longer in session, we are providing "Summer Services" to address your child's IEP goals. In addition to working on goals this summer, we want to continue to give your child the opportunity to play and interact with other children. The groups will be facilitated by the DART staff currently working with your child.
Date is Tuesdays from 8:45am-9:45am on the following dates June 15, June 22, July 20, July 27, and August 3.
Our focus will be to continue to address your child's specific needs and individual IEP goals, while at the same time introducing him/her to another small group experience. We hope that you will help us to create a fun and enjoyable summer learning experience for your child. If you have any questions or concerns regarding this opportunity, feel free to contact me."
So the SUMMER PROGRAM is 5 dates for an hour each day. It's not even every week for the summer. It's 15th, 22nd... skip the 29th, 6th, 13th... 20th, 27th, and 3rd.... What good is that going to do?
Well, I guess since he has no issues it probably won't matter :P
~ On the summer issue... We applied for the Mini-Grant for Liam. It's a grant for kids on the spectrum to help out with stuff. I applied for it for some camps for the summer: The Pgh Zoo, The Science Center, and The Carnegie Museum. The problem is we won't know for another week or two if we got the grant. Without the grant, we can't afford these programs. BUT if we wait on the grant to be approved, we might not get spots in the programs. My understanding is that the grant monies come in the form of a check for the place you're asking for... so I'm worried that if we can't get into the place, we're going to have this useless check... pretty much a doily. *sigh*
~ I'm also so tired of listening to and respecting other people's points of views and having them NOT listen to and respect mine. I try to listen to everyone's point of view. I feel that you can always learn something new and even if your points don't mesh, it's useful to know why someone doesn't agree with you. BUT if I spend the time to listen to you, I expect you to listen to me. I don't expect you to agree with me, just respect my opinion.
~ I also am annoyed that I keep forgetting to give the boys the supplements that Dr Faber wants them to have. I have them here. They are sitting right here. I can see them from where I sit. BUT they either hate the taste or I forget to give them to them. *sigh* It's so frustrating.
I could go on for a bit longer i'm sure, but this is probably long enough for now. After all of that I actually feel a lot better. I'm going to finish up my paper on the "Importance of Infant and Toddler Nutrition", and then take a bath with my new soap from one of my vendors, Sheepish Grins. I have a "Green Tea" Goats Milk Soap and an "Oatmeal, Milk and Honey" one.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
To my friends in California....
I'm cross-posting this a bunch of places, so apologies if you get this more than once....
I want to take a Lactation Consultant program at UC San Diego Extension that begins in September and runs through May/June of next year. For those of you that have followed my CLCE program I was doing this fall, this is the next step to that and will make me eligible for taking the IBCLC exam in 2011.
The big difference between this program and the one that I took this fall is that I have to be on campus for 8 two-day times during the program. There are several locations I can choose from:
Stockton (Sept 7-8, Oct 14-15, Nov 16-17, Jan 6-7, Feb 3-4, March 3-4, April 14-15, May 12-13)
San Jose (Sept 15-16, Oct 21-22, Nov 18-19, Jan 11-12, Feb 10-11, Mar 10-11, Apr 21-22, May 19-20)
West Covina (Sept 23-24, Oct 28-29, Dec 2-3, Jan 4-5, Feb 17-18, Mar 10-11, Apr 28-29, May 26-27)
San Diego (Sept 30-Oct 1, Nov 4-5, Dec 9-10, Jan 27-28, Feb 24-25, Mar 24-25, May 5-6, June 2-3)
I am wondering if any of you know of places that are cheap to stay overnight in any of these locations? I'm going to call the school too and see if they have anything set up for out of town/state people, but figured I'd also poke my friends who may be local or who are familiar with things there. I'm also thinking of trying priceline and similar.
I want to take a Lactation Consultant program at UC San Diego Extension that begins in September and runs through May/June of next year. For those of you that have followed my CLCE program I was doing this fall, this is the next step to that and will make me eligible for taking the IBCLC exam in 2011.
The big difference between this program and the one that I took this fall is that I have to be on campus for 8 two-day times during the program. There are several locations I can choose from:
Stockton (Sept 7-8, Oct 14-15, Nov 16-17, Jan 6-7, Feb 3-4, March 3-4, April 14-15, May 12-13)
San Jose (Sept 15-16, Oct 21-22, Nov 18-19, Jan 11-12, Feb 10-11, Mar 10-11, Apr 21-22, May 19-20)
West Covina (Sept 23-24, Oct 28-29, Dec 2-3, Jan 4-5, Feb 17-18, Mar 10-11, Apr 28-29, May 26-27)
San Diego (Sept 30-Oct 1, Nov 4-5, Dec 9-10, Jan 27-28, Feb 24-25, Mar 24-25, May 5-6, June 2-3)
I am wondering if any of you know of places that are cheap to stay overnight in any of these locations? I'm going to call the school too and see if they have anything set up for out of town/state people, but figured I'd also poke my friends who may be local or who are familiar with things there. I'm also thinking of trying priceline and similar.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
Sometimes things are a privilege...
Somethings in life are offered as a privilege and an honor and should be respected with dignity.
Those same things can be taken away from you for things that happened in the past that weren't you fault.
This should be taken with the same dignity.
Those same things can be taken away from you for things that happened in the past that weren't you fault.
This should be taken with the same dignity.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
I miss you Grandma...
In a few hours, it will be 5 years since my Grandmother passed away.
From the time I was born, until I left for college in the fall of 1996, I saw Grandma and Papa every day. Usually multiple times. When I was waiting on the bus for school, I'd get up a bit earlier to go in and talk to her before it was time to go to the stop. When I moved, I'd call her several times a day just to see what she was up to and what she was scolding Papa about doing that he shouldn't have been doing. Like crawling up in the unfinished attic to get something that he didn't really need, or setting up scaffolding to check on the chimney. Sometimes I think he just did things to make her react *lol*
When I was getting things ready for my wedding and there was a huge issue with my dress, Grandma bitched at the woman and pretty much tore her a new asshole. If I wouldn't have been so upset at the time, I would have been laughing at this woman cowering over my little 5 foot tall grandma screaming at this woman. I remember the drive home from Ohio, where the shop was, where Grandma was fuming the whole way. Makes me giggle now just to think of how she was able to hold a grudge against this woman. She wasn't about to let this idiot ruin my wedding -- and she wasn't shy about letting anyone know about it either!
I remember driving up to her place after a dr's appointment I had on September 11, 2001. I had lunch with her as we watched the news coverage about the Twin Towers. She begged me not to go back down to Pittsburgh since there was such worry about something happening with CMU or one of the other big things down here. Part of me wanted to stay with her since she was so afraid, but another part wanted to get back down home to check on everyone else. I stayed there longer than I think I would have otherwise and then headed back home. I called her several times that day to give her updates. I remember how worried she was that we were too close to where something could happen.
She was tickled pink (or blue as the case may be) when I told her I was pregnant with Liam. She loved us grandkids, but we were chopped liver compared to the great-grandkids. Papa ended up in the hospital with quadruple bypass surgery and replacement of his aortic valve just a week or so before my baby shower. Poor Grandma was torn between wanting to be at the shower and wanting to be with Papa. I felt horrible for her. She ended up coming to the shower and then leaving to go to Papa's hospital room. I'd drive up from Pittsburgh to Butler when Mom had to work to drive Grandma in to the hospital, or to pick her up after Mom dropped her off in the morning to take her home to force her to relax. Tho anyone who ever knew Grandma knew she didn't relax that easily. After Liam was born, she was the first one I wanted someone to call. I remember calling her the next day from the hospital and her telling me that she didn't want us to drive up for Papa's birthday party on the 3rd. I told her like hell I wouldn't be there! I think she knew that I wasn't going to miss bringing Liam up to meet them:
Again, she loved her great-grandkids more than I thought possible of anyone to love someone. This is Liam in the crib that was Grandma's when she was a baby:
How many kids are lucky enough to sleep or play in a crib that was their great-grandmothers? Not very many at all ;)
She loved babysitting him while I went to help Mom at her office. She never would tell us if she was in pain and couldn't take care of him. She always wanted to. She'd sit with him in that squeaky old rocking chair with no arm supports that was in the diningroom and rock with him for hours. I remember one time we came in and she said "Oh good. My arm fell asleep about 20 mins ago, but I didn't want to put him down!" She was afraid he'd wake up ;)
She always had so much joy in her face when she was playing with him (or really any of the great-grandkids for that matter)
She hated to get her picture taken, but would never fight if she had a kid in her lap ;)
Even when they all wouldn't fit on her lap at the same time:
And then she finally had her great-granddaughters. OMG I thought she was going to go through the roof with excitement. I actually don't have any of her and Esther on my computer... Thought I did. Hrm... But I do have her and Victoria:
I think the worst thing about when she got sick was she couldn't play with the kids... and couldn't hold them. I know somewhere I have the last pictures of her holding Victoria and Esther as babies, during her last Thanksgiving and Christmas, but I don't know where they are right now... and honestly, I don't want to remember her that way. I want to remember her as the woman who took me camping... who "fought" with Papa about little things, but never actually fought... who loved her husband more than anything, and he loved her back just as much, if not more.
I visited her at the hospitals with Liam. I didn't care if kids were allowed there or not. He was there and they could just deal. Liam and I visited her at Sunnyview and I tried to figure out ways to move back home to take care of her in her own home for her last months. I still to this day wish I would have figured out some way... Papa ended up with pneumonia and couldn't go in to see her for those last few weeks. That still tears me up like I should have been able to do something about it. I called her on the phone in the nursing home and talked to her as much as I could. My phone bill for those last two months was through the roof, but I didn't care. I would have done anything to talk to her more... to be there with her more.
Mom called me first thing that morning to let me know, but part of me already knew. I know part of her knew before she answered the call from the nursing home to tell her.
At her funeral, we were able to put together montages of her old pictures. Mom found one that she had sent Papa when he was overseas in the war. It was the most hilarious picture! She had her skirt hiked up and was posed all sexy. I'm sure she cursed the hell out of us for finding it and having it on display at the funeral. That is right before she laughed at us for laughing like hyenas at it.
I still think that it was Grandma who enticed Liam to run behind (and then around) the casket... almost knocking it and all of the flowers over. Almost gave Aunt Dorothy (Grandma's sister) a heart attack when she saw the curtains suddenly moving... then we saw this cute little face peek out and smile.
I also remember that her funeral was the first (and probably only) that I had ever been to that had a "play room" set up beside the viewing. We all had our kids with us. I'm sure some people think that a funeral isn't a good place for kids, but honestly, it's where we all needed to be. Liam doesn't remember the funeral, tho he remembers going to her grave and putting a rose into the casket box before it was lowered into the ground. Liam remembers playing with her and Papa. He asks to go visit Grandma Eleanor's grave and occasionally scolds me when we don't go often enough.
Ethan was born the year that Grandma passed away... but at the end of it, rather than the beginning. 2005 started with a death, and ended with a birth for me. We came up to Grandma's grave when Ethan was not very old. Liam asked if he could come up and said he had something very important to do. I said sure... couldn't figure out what he had to do. He made me get the baby out of the car and go to the grave. He told Ethan that he wanted him to meet Grandma Eleanor. Then he went and sat down infront of her tombstone and told her all about Ethan and about how much that she would have loved playing with him had she still been alive. Then he turned to me and told me that she already knew how great he was -- he said she came and visited us regularly, so there was no need for me to cry about her being gone. She wasn't.
Then he kissed her name on the tombstone and got back into the car.
There is only one thing that I'd like to ask of Grandma now... 5 years after her death... How can I help Papa more? I know he's hurting more than any of us. He lives in the house that he built for her some 60 years ago. He lives alone. My Mom goes in to take care of him daily and makes him food, pays his bills, etc, but she works during the days. My dad is not the kind of person who would do anything to help someone, so 99.9% of the time he won't speak to Papa for any reason. I can't get up nearly as often as I want to with the boys. I could call him more, but he hates talking on the phone -- which is the opposite of Grandma who practically had a phone attached to her ear at all times. I just want to know what to do for him to make him know just how much we love him too. I want him to feel the love that used to be all around him when Grandma was alive. I want to see him laugh and smile like he used to at family gatherings.
I guess I just want him to have Grandma back.
From the time I was born, until I left for college in the fall of 1996, I saw Grandma and Papa every day. Usually multiple times. When I was waiting on the bus for school, I'd get up a bit earlier to go in and talk to her before it was time to go to the stop. When I moved, I'd call her several times a day just to see what she was up to and what she was scolding Papa about doing that he shouldn't have been doing. Like crawling up in the unfinished attic to get something that he didn't really need, or setting up scaffolding to check on the chimney. Sometimes I think he just did things to make her react *lol*
When I was getting things ready for my wedding and there was a huge issue with my dress, Grandma bitched at the woman and pretty much tore her a new asshole. If I wouldn't have been so upset at the time, I would have been laughing at this woman cowering over my little 5 foot tall grandma screaming at this woman. I remember the drive home from Ohio, where the shop was, where Grandma was fuming the whole way. Makes me giggle now just to think of how she was able to hold a grudge against this woman. She wasn't about to let this idiot ruin my wedding -- and she wasn't shy about letting anyone know about it either!
I remember driving up to her place after a dr's appointment I had on September 11, 2001. I had lunch with her as we watched the news coverage about the Twin Towers. She begged me not to go back down to Pittsburgh since there was such worry about something happening with CMU or one of the other big things down here. Part of me wanted to stay with her since she was so afraid, but another part wanted to get back down home to check on everyone else. I stayed there longer than I think I would have otherwise and then headed back home. I called her several times that day to give her updates. I remember how worried she was that we were too close to where something could happen.
She was tickled pink (or blue as the case may be) when I told her I was pregnant with Liam. She loved us grandkids, but we were chopped liver compared to the great-grandkids. Papa ended up in the hospital with quadruple bypass surgery and replacement of his aortic valve just a week or so before my baby shower. Poor Grandma was torn between wanting to be at the shower and wanting to be with Papa. I felt horrible for her. She ended up coming to the shower and then leaving to go to Papa's hospital room. I'd drive up from Pittsburgh to Butler when Mom had to work to drive Grandma in to the hospital, or to pick her up after Mom dropped her off in the morning to take her home to force her to relax. Tho anyone who ever knew Grandma knew she didn't relax that easily. After Liam was born, she was the first one I wanted someone to call. I remember calling her the next day from the hospital and her telling me that she didn't want us to drive up for Papa's birthday party on the 3rd. I told her like hell I wouldn't be there! I think she knew that I wasn't going to miss bringing Liam up to meet them:
Again, she loved her great-grandkids more than I thought possible of anyone to love someone. This is Liam in the crib that was Grandma's when she was a baby:
How many kids are lucky enough to sleep or play in a crib that was their great-grandmothers? Not very many at all ;)
She loved babysitting him while I went to help Mom at her office. She never would tell us if she was in pain and couldn't take care of him. She always wanted to. She'd sit with him in that squeaky old rocking chair with no arm supports that was in the diningroom and rock with him for hours. I remember one time we came in and she said "Oh good. My arm fell asleep about 20 mins ago, but I didn't want to put him down!" She was afraid he'd wake up ;)
She always had so much joy in her face when she was playing with him (or really any of the great-grandkids for that matter)
She hated to get her picture taken, but would never fight if she had a kid in her lap ;)
Even when they all wouldn't fit on her lap at the same time:
And then she finally had her great-granddaughters. OMG I thought she was going to go through the roof with excitement. I actually don't have any of her and Esther on my computer... Thought I did. Hrm... But I do have her and Victoria:
I think the worst thing about when she got sick was she couldn't play with the kids... and couldn't hold them. I know somewhere I have the last pictures of her holding Victoria and Esther as babies, during her last Thanksgiving and Christmas, but I don't know where they are right now... and honestly, I don't want to remember her that way. I want to remember her as the woman who took me camping... who "fought" with Papa about little things, but never actually fought... who loved her husband more than anything, and he loved her back just as much, if not more.
I visited her at the hospitals with Liam. I didn't care if kids were allowed there or not. He was there and they could just deal. Liam and I visited her at Sunnyview and I tried to figure out ways to move back home to take care of her in her own home for her last months. I still to this day wish I would have figured out some way... Papa ended up with pneumonia and couldn't go in to see her for those last few weeks. That still tears me up like I should have been able to do something about it. I called her on the phone in the nursing home and talked to her as much as I could. My phone bill for those last two months was through the roof, but I didn't care. I would have done anything to talk to her more... to be there with her more.
Mom called me first thing that morning to let me know, but part of me already knew. I know part of her knew before she answered the call from the nursing home to tell her.
At her funeral, we were able to put together montages of her old pictures. Mom found one that she had sent Papa when he was overseas in the war. It was the most hilarious picture! She had her skirt hiked up and was posed all sexy. I'm sure she cursed the hell out of us for finding it and having it on display at the funeral. That is right before she laughed at us for laughing like hyenas at it.
I still think that it was Grandma who enticed Liam to run behind (and then around) the casket... almost knocking it and all of the flowers over. Almost gave Aunt Dorothy (Grandma's sister) a heart attack when she saw the curtains suddenly moving... then we saw this cute little face peek out and smile.
I also remember that her funeral was the first (and probably only) that I had ever been to that had a "play room" set up beside the viewing. We all had our kids with us. I'm sure some people think that a funeral isn't a good place for kids, but honestly, it's where we all needed to be. Liam doesn't remember the funeral, tho he remembers going to her grave and putting a rose into the casket box before it was lowered into the ground. Liam remembers playing with her and Papa. He asks to go visit Grandma Eleanor's grave and occasionally scolds me when we don't go often enough.
Ethan was born the year that Grandma passed away... but at the end of it, rather than the beginning. 2005 started with a death, and ended with a birth for me. We came up to Grandma's grave when Ethan was not very old. Liam asked if he could come up and said he had something very important to do. I said sure... couldn't figure out what he had to do. He made me get the baby out of the car and go to the grave. He told Ethan that he wanted him to meet Grandma Eleanor. Then he went and sat down infront of her tombstone and told her all about Ethan and about how much that she would have loved playing with him had she still been alive. Then he turned to me and told me that she already knew how great he was -- he said she came and visited us regularly, so there was no need for me to cry about her being gone. She wasn't.
Then he kissed her name on the tombstone and got back into the car.
There is only one thing that I'd like to ask of Grandma now... 5 years after her death... How can I help Papa more? I know he's hurting more than any of us. He lives in the house that he built for her some 60 years ago. He lives alone. My Mom goes in to take care of him daily and makes him food, pays his bills, etc, but she works during the days. My dad is not the kind of person who would do anything to help someone, so 99.9% of the time he won't speak to Papa for any reason. I can't get up nearly as often as I want to with the boys. I could call him more, but he hates talking on the phone -- which is the opposite of Grandma who practically had a phone attached to her ear at all times. I just want to know what to do for him to make him know just how much we love him too. I want him to feel the love that used to be all around him when Grandma was alive. I want to see him laugh and smile like he used to at family gatherings.
I guess I just want him to have Grandma back.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Copied from my LJ
I have a second journal at http://skyrose.livejournal.com/ which usually has more non-parenting stuff. I'll probably be cross-posting for a while until I figure out what is doing where ;)
Things I miss... or do you have to visit a Hellmouth to find a date?
I was watching some old episodes of Buffy today while sketching my outline for class and it made me think of a lot of things. I'm probably one of the few people who start thinking deeply about things while watching *Buffy*, but anyways....
Watching the scenes with Zander and Cordelia... and then the whole thing with Willow/Zander and Willow/Oz and Zander/Cordelia made me really wish that I had someone to go out with... to cuddle with... to have sex with... hell, someone who cares about me in that way at all or who can touch me without making it look like they've just touched someone with the plague accidentally. I miss it.
What I do know is that I miss having a guy (or girl) to just flirt with, hang out with, to come with me to take the kids to the mall to the play area. Someone to be with to enjoy each other's company. Not to be forced or coerced to do stuff and have them sitting and watching the clock the whole time.
Come to think about it, when I was dating, Karl and I got along a *lot* better than any other time. Maybe we are both just more relaxed? I don't know.
I'm not even sure where I would go to find someone. I never really did the whole "dating" thing to begin with, so it's not like I could "get back into" it. And really, where does one who has two kids with special needs get time to date or find someone!? Is there a match.com for parents of special needs kids? :P
Or, as I said in the subject... do you have to visit a Hellmouth to find a date?
Mood: curious
Things I miss... or do you have to visit a Hellmouth to find a date?
I was watching some old episodes of Buffy today while sketching my outline for class and it made me think of a lot of things. I'm probably one of the few people who start thinking deeply about things while watching *Buffy*, but anyways....
Watching the scenes with Zander and Cordelia... and then the whole thing with Willow/Zander and Willow/Oz and Zander/Cordelia made me really wish that I had someone to go out with... to cuddle with... to have sex with... hell, someone who cares about me in that way at all or who can touch me without making it look like they've just touched someone with the plague accidentally. I miss it.
What I do know is that I miss having a guy (or girl) to just flirt with, hang out with, to come with me to take the kids to the mall to the play area. Someone to be with to enjoy each other's company. Not to be forced or coerced to do stuff and have them sitting and watching the clock the whole time.
Come to think about it, when I was dating, Karl and I got along a *lot* better than any other time. Maybe we are both just more relaxed? I don't know.
I'm not even sure where I would go to find someone. I never really did the whole "dating" thing to begin with, so it's not like I could "get back into" it. And really, where does one who has two kids with special needs get time to date or find someone!? Is there a match.com for parents of special needs kids? :P
Or, as I said in the subject... do you have to visit a Hellmouth to find a date?
Mood: curious
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